Black people who have been on the Internet since the arrival of Web 2.0 will no doubt have at one time come across the “African-American Gender War.” This conflict is representative of the series of changes that are now occurring throughout Western Society, in this case, the shifting role of men and women , in our relationships, in the home and at work. No where have these shifts been more obvious than in the African American community, which has traditionally served as a canary in the coalmine for future social trends in Western Society. But if the group of men that I am about to discuss are indicator of what the future holds, then we may as well prepare for the extinction of the human race.
What I describe as the Black Men Venters (BMVs) are an Internet subculture that emerged in the middle of the last (2000s) decade . They consist of websites and forums such as the aforementioned Black Men Vent and Diary of a Tired Black Man among others. These websites are the epicenter of bitchism on the African-American side of the Internet. While I will describe the philosophy known as bitchism at a later date, key to the ideology of the bitchist is what Clarence E Walker calls a “therapeutic mythology.” The therapeutic mythology may considered a grand non-narrative, as while a grand narrative provides people with a view of human history that gives meaning to the past, explains the present, and provides guidance for the future, the therapeutic myth gives false guidance that is explicitly ahistorical. Thus the BMVs mythology.
The Grand Narrative of Black Men Vent
Lyndon Johnson’s Great Society social policies, combined with the Women’s movement, gave black women in the United States no need to put off having sex until marriage, or to get married and start a nuclear family. This is demonstrated by the massive jump in unwed pregnancies from the ’06s to the 70s. As a result of the above social changes the black woman has become a rude, arrogant, self-centered, vulgar, promiscuous, ill-mannered harpy. She no longer desires the company of stable, well-mannered, good black men, but instead seeks out the company of thugs, gangsters, playboys and athletes. The result is that a very small number of black men having access to all the black women they want. This has led to black women being 70% unmarried, with an almost 80% out of wedlock birth rate and an almost 50% STD (herpes) rate.
The problems with the above narrative should be obvious. What exactly is a “good black men?” And who decides what a “good black man ” is? What about that other LBJ “social program” that put thousands of young black men into that little Indochina work program? If the marriage, out of wedlock rates and STD rates for black women are so high, what are the rates for men? (Answer to last question – 39 percent of blacks have herpes, close to 60 percent of black men have herpes in some age groups, 1 in 16 black men will be diagnosed with HIV, compared to 1 in 32 black women) Haven’t they heard that black women were marginalized in the women’s movement, by middle class white women, or that black women were none too pleased that there concerns were not being articulated?
Let us describe the “good black man” From simply lurking around on the Black Men Vent forum it usually means a nerd who is into Information Technology (i.e. System Administration and Web Design ) who is not aggressive, and would like a woman to “choose” him. The “good black man ” is not cocky or overly aggressive, he doesn’t have swagger – but he sure is polite! But black women don’t want him. Black women don’t want men who are nice them , they want men that are “rough”, aggressive, flashy and sexually promiscuous. So black women now gravitate towards thugs, athletes, drug dealers and “bad boys.” This applies to all black women – no exceptions. This is how the BMVs explain not just their inability to attract black women, but also the various pathologies in the African-American community.
It would be laughable if it weren’t so pathetic.
“The girls don’t want me because I’m a nerd!” “They only want thugs!”
If professional black women are hooking up with thugs and players, then where are they? Where are the pictures and social media interactions between these doctors of medicine, esquires, corporate deal makers dating the drug dealers and criminal masterminds in the black community? Where the hell are they? And why are these men putting themselves in a position that they have to compete with thugs and criminals for women?
Already we have seen four of the essential features of bitchism :
Four features of bitchism
- A superficial reliance on statistics. The only way the statistics that the bitchist uses can be justified is to completely de-contextualize them and repeat them without giving the “full picture.” As the BMV bitchist lacks a lucid set of ethics , eschewed tradition and lacks a coherent philosophy, he must rely on the idea of statistical objectivity. Statistical objectivity woks well with widgets, atoms, clouds, People’s National Party politicians and other non-living things, but with something as complex and nebulous as the human being , it is absolutely useless. To assume that individual members of a group have the average characteristics of the group at large is fallacious. Statistics that accurately describe group characteristics do not necessarily apply to individuals within that group.
- Value Reversal. The bitchist usually is scorned by society due to the fact (in the case of BMV) of his geekiness, social awkwardness and misogyny. Most people in such a situation would re-evaluate themselves, and improve, or create a completely new subculture outside of mainstream society. Not the bitchist. He is like the fox that can’t get the grapes he wants, so he says they are sour. The bitchist can’t get the women he wants so the women are “ankles”, and the men become “simps”, “manginas” and “thugs”. The nerd (him in this case) becomes valorized – all other men become losers and all non-black (or non-Western) women are whores and ankles.
- Binary-world view. The BMV sees the world in absolutes. There are only nerds and jocks. Black women and non black women. Him versus them. Thus the appeal of the movies like 300, complete with the fascist undertones. They see themselves as the few against the many, when all they are the latest set of misogynists to arrive in the black community.
- Permanent struggle. When the BMV have marshalled all their statistics, and they have slain all the ankles, and when they have shamed all the thugs – what then? What is their endgame? Yes, they will they will marry their non-black woman (yeah right!) but what about the rest of the black community, that they so love to comment on? The BMVs have indeed identified several issues among their female counterparts that are worth discussing. Where they differ from others that focus on such issues is that they propose no solution. They only offer shaming tactics and concern trolling.
It’s not because the members of Black Men Vent et. al. are nerds that cause black women to reject them. It’s because they are passive-aggressive bitches that want to be the very thing that they claim to hate, but lack the balls to become.
Even sadder still, is that they believe that non-black, primarily white women will see them for the “nice guys” that they are and
take pity upon them decide that they should be in relationships with them.
That is an odd belief, seeing that it was white women that that originally identified, mocked and scorned the “nice guy.” It is quite ironic that they would adopt a Steve Urkel like character as their Hero archetype. On the sitcom “Family Matters”, Urkel chased endlessly after Laura, even though Myrna – his female counterpart obsessed over him, and did not hide her obsession from him. Perhaps the BMVs Myrna could be just like that lady in the green ringer T and khaki slacks, just with dark skin? Thy would be perfect for each other, as he, the nice guy, would not need to do any pursuing, as Myrna, the nerd would pursue him. But that’s not what most “nice guys” are truly attracted to.
In our neo-liberal age almost all militant and civil rights groups have been rendered impotent. From the Black Panther party to the Rastafarian movement, most counter-cultural groups have either been destroyed, converted, or worse, rendered irrelevant. But even before then, these had come to see mainstream middle class and blue collar workers as sell-outs, or apostates, and thus distanced themselves from their daily concerns. Lacking the external point of view that balances the ideology of those groups, they soon became infected with the quest for ideological purity, internal repression, paranoia and self-exaltation. In other words they became exactly like capitalist system and repressive state that they originally set out to defeat.
The same thing has now happened with these men that became members of Black Men Vent. They have internalized all the negative stereotypes about lower class black men and black men in general, and even created a few more stereotypes about black men and black women. They would rather sit behind a computer screen and shame people to feed their own fragile egos. It’s sad, as their message is filled with so much racism and misogyny that hardly anyone is going to take them seriously enough for them to leave the Internet and reach the real world. And from what is on videos like the below, they may very much like it that way.
Mi nuh want yu likkle nigger gyal, mi want a white gyal!
I don’t think that I need to translate the above quote from patois to English for anyone to realize the level of racist misogyny and contempt that the members of Black Men Vent have towards black women. Now, this is hardly the mainstream belief of most Jamaicans (the main speaker is obviously a minstrel), nevertheless bitchism, in general has gripped Jamaica,just like most of the Western world.
One would think that given the identical problems that black men and black women in the United States that these men would be more than willing to join up with their black women and at least set some sort of think tank or not-for-profit that would help educate poor people wo are at greater risk of catching STIs. Instead , they would rather stay on the Internet and berate black women, in the same way that their female counterparts , the Black Women’s Empowerment movement, disparage black men and the black race.
Black Men Vent, and other misogynists are merely a symptom of the modern world. They are not slacktivists, as the slacktivist actually believes in bis cause. They are nihilists, but rather than openly announce that they have given up on making the world a better place, they adopt the manner of the original community activist, but only to uplift themselves at the expense of others. They are black men who vent, bitch and moan. And isn’t that what the bitchist is? A nihilist in slacktivist’s clothing?
In my next entry in the series on bitchism, I will take on the female version of Black Men Vent, the Black Women Empowerment movement, then go on to Afrocentricism, and finally Rastafarianism on the home stretch.